10 things no one ever told me before I had kids

• I would never pee alone again - It seems even if I wait until my children seem to be completely occupied by a toy or the TV as soon as I step into the bathroom I hear little hands opening the door or a loud voice screaming because I've actually locked the door.

• I will always end up sharing my food - Even if I fix them a plate that looks identical to mine, whatever I'm eating seems to look so much tastier to them.

• Cheap cell phones are a better investment in the long run - Prior to my iphone I had a fairly cheap phone that was not the least bit smart. During it's 4 years of service as my phone it was dropped in the toilet 3 times, dropped in a cup of coffee once, fell off the roof of my car twice, and was dropped more times than I can even count! To this day... that phone STILL works... However my infant daughter managed to shatter my iphone within the first month of it's life. I've had it for about 6 months now and it is slowly dying.

• Buy leather - It costs more up front, but doesn't get stains from pee, and crayons are easier to wash off. I've had my couches now for about 5 years and I think they've been peed of more than 10 times. Even though I clean them sometimes daily, they still have so many stains! My poor couches have been used and abused from all the children that have used them as canvases, jungle gyms, kitchen tables, and toilets.

• Childcare is freakin' exspensive and not worth near what you pay! - During Angel's lifetime I had to work from the time she turned about 10months old until she was 5. After paying for gas and childcare I didn't have much left out of my paycheck to show for all the work I did. Once Abigail was born I had nothing to show for it, but a negative balance! That's when I started to realize it just wasn't worth it! I'm not trying to harp on people that have to work and can make it work, but for me I didn't feel like my children got the kind of care and attention they deserved for what I was having to pay out, so Abigail only spent two weeks in childcare. Work can wait until she's in school! Until then I'll keep writing, drawing, and clipping coupons!

• They aren’t ALWAYS cute! - That split second when you turn to see your one-year-old covered in wet toilet paper with empty rolls on the floor all around her and a toilet completely clogged.. or you walk into your two-year-old's room after a nap and see her naked covered from head to toe in poop, her crib bars covered in poop, and the wall next to her crib covered in poop... They aren't looking all that cute!

• Just because they get older doesn’t mean you get to start sleeping in! - Angel is six now and most weekends I hear her wake up at 6am. I hear her push a chair scrapping across the floor. I hear her open a cabinet door and pour a bowl of cereal. I hear her push the chair back. I hear her spill the milk everywhere and then I hear her trying to clean it up. I hear her turn on the TV and not know how to turn the volume down. When I get up to turn it down I see that she didn't do that great of a job cleaning the milk and that most of the cereal missed the bowl... Needless to say.. I only slept in until about 6:15am

• Most little boys require being completely naked before pooping on the toilet - After watching my little cousin Noah for a few days it wasn't until the last day that he was here that I realized the reason He kept pooping in his pants (or on the bathroom floor) was because he couldn't get his SHIRT off in time! Now I know...

• You have to explain that it’s NOT ok to play with yourself in public! - I don't think I have to explain this one any further...

• Everyone else in the world… even stranger in the check out line at wal-mart think they should have some sort of say in how you raise your children.

Of course knowing these things would not have stopped me from having them, but at least I would have been better prepared!

"From Me to You"

A friend of mine posted a picture of this house with a caption that said "This guy was told by his Homeowners Association that he couldn't fly the American flag in his yard. So..." Many people left comments giving much credit to this man for being a "true American" with his protest. I found this pretty interested and wanted to read the whole story, so I googled it. I was quite surprised when I found out that the truth behind this house's interesting decor actually had nothing to do with the American flag at all! While there have been cases where homeowners associations have made rules about flying flags that wasn't the case for this guy. He was protesting the fact that his windows were not up to historical code. He found no rules about what colors to paint his house so he painted it like this. He painted his other Victorian house in black.

After reading that it led me to look up another interesting story I read recently on facebook. This was a picture I myself re-posted because I thought it looked cool. One of the most popular versions of this picture has a caption claiming that a young boy chained his bike to a tree in 1914 and went off to war never returning again.  People have lots of pride in 

our country and love stories like that. It sounded too easily made up to me. I did some digging and found tons of stories about this bike in the tree. There's even a children's book written inspired by the tree that some claim as truth. Key word is INSPIRED! 

After about an hour of searching the only reliable thing I'd found was that was in fact real and not photo shopped. I was beginning to give up thinking that this was one of those stories to remain a mystery... 

Until I found a story on snopes.com. The true story is that Don Puz was given a bike back in 1954. He and some friends were out playing in the woods. Don was the only one that had ridden his bike out to the woods. He didn't really like it all that much and didn't feel like carrying it home, so he left it there and forgot about it.

Years later when the bike was discovered Don and his mother paid a visit and he recognized the bike right away. Although the war story does sound much cooler it's not the truth.

What I find interesting about all of this is how easily we take facebook news as actual news. A little over a year ago I changed the name on one of my ultrasound pictures of Abigail. I took out my name and stuck in my friends name. I didn't change anything else about the picture and then hacked onto my friends account (with her permission so I guess it wasn't really hacking) and posted the picture. The amount of people who automatically assumed she was expecting was astounding! Especially those who'd seen these exact pictures on my page!

Next viral facebook photo:

Youngest snake handler in the world!

"Paperback Writer"

I saw an interesting story on the news today about a kid from the town of Bagdad, Florida (yes, there really is such a place!) who won the 2012 masters golf tournament. The most interesting part to me wasn't so much that he was from a tiny town with no more than a gas station and a few houses, but when he was asked how he did it he gave so much credit to his mom. He claimed that his mom worked two jobs while he was in high school in order to pay for all of his golf equipment so that he could play on his school team. He never had any formal lessons, but he did have some amazing encouragement from his parents.

That story reminded me of how my dad was when I was little. When I was 6 years old he noticed how much I liked to draw pictures and make up stories to go with them. He bought me a hard cover journal where I could draw my pictures and he would then write the stories for me next to my pictures. Not only that but even to this day my dad's encouragement and money he's spent over the years in buying me art supplies is the reason I stay home and draw and paint pictures for a living today.

In school I didn't have a lot of confidence in myself. I was very shy, withdrawn, and insecure. Fortunately I've grown into a very confident person. Most of the credit goes to my parents, and all of the other adults that helped raise me (including teachers, grandparents, aunts, and uncles.. I believe every adult who is in a child's life has a hand in raising them), and of course to my awesome hair! (thanks to God and BJ Barre' at Southern Charm Hair Studio)

My daughter, Angel, started showing an interest in art at the age of two. I have several of her art works framed and hanging in my home. The biggest thing I've noticed, however, is her ability to tell a story. She is 6 now and has written several stories that we've illustrated together. They are stories she has written for her baby sister, Abigail. It's my goal to keep her confident in herself and let her express her imagination as much as possible so that she knows she can do and be anything.

My youngest daughter, Abigail, is only 18 months old, but she already loves to "sing" along when music is playing. She loves to play my mom's piano, and my dad's bamboo flutes. She will turn anything into a drum and can already find the beat to any song. That's why we have her very first set of bongo drums hidden in our closet. We are planning on giving them to her when she turns two.

Will my heart be broken if Angel grows up to become a successful employee of McDonald's instead of an artist or a writer, or if Abigail grows up and is successful a stay at home mom rather than a musician? Of course not! I say successful because I know that no matter what they become when they grow up they will be successful! The only thing that would hurt my feelings would be if I didn't do everything in my power to encourage them and shape them now to show them their full potential. 

"Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite!"

I was recently chatting with a friend about our babies. I find I do this all the time when I'm talking to a fellow mom, and one thing that always comes up is how other people try and tell us how to raise our kids. We all hear it.. sometimes almost every day "Why are you letting her eat that? You shouldn't let her do that! She's not sleeping in her own room?? She's still using a pacifier? Your baby is almost two... why can't she read yet!"

The funny thing is.. most of the time the people making such comments either have no children of their own or haven't had a baby in over twenty years!

I'm not sure what it is really, but the moment I became pregnant people felt obligated to touch my belly and ask me very personal questions. Luckily for me I ignored the looks I got from completely strangers as I cradled my venti latte on top of my over-sized belly. It made it easier to ignore the looks I got when my newest daughter didn't wear shoes on her feet the entire first year of her life.

When Abigail was first born I'd let just about anyone hold her or feel her soft hair and skin. Often times when I went to my older daughter, Angel's, preschool class I'd kneel down putting newborn baby Abigail within arms reach of the children. This put one of the employees there in a bit of a panic as several toddlers surrounded me wanting to lay hands on my baby.

"No, no!" She would say to the children.
"It's ok!" I said to her as I helped guide the children one at a time on how to gently pet my baby.
"Oh, but they are dirty! You don't know where their hands have been! They can touch her feet and that's it!"

I'm sure their hands have been in dirt, in their mouths, touching bugs, down their pants, up their nose, up their friends nose.. ect.. This wasn't my first time around the block with a newborn! I remember thinking in my mind.. does this woman think I don't bathe my baby or something? The truth is if Abigail were to get sick from one of those kids she'd get sick just by breathing the air in the room not because they touched her...

It's been about a year and a half since then. Abigail is now a bouncy toddler. (looks like she survived the touches of snotty fingers!) She loves to be around people. Many times when I'm in a group I'll hear someone say "Baby's don't like me. They don't go to me." I'll tell them to simply hold their hands out, and just as fast as they do Abigail will reach for them.

Every time we go shopping Abigail smiles, waves, claps, laughs, talks, and blows kisses at strangers. Tell me if you were having a bad day wouldn't it make it so much better if a baby in a passing cart blew you a kiss??

One time as we were leaving a store I saw a girl at a register who looked a little down. This was a store that we frequently shop at and this cashier was one of my favorites to chat with. We stood in her line even though it wasn't the shortest. As soon as it was our turn I put Abigail down and she RAN to the cashier and leaped into her arms and gave her the biggest toddler hug she could...

So maybe I don't always make her wear her shoes. Maybe I'd rather let her play in her cheerios instead of focus on learning shapes and colors. I let her help me put away the dishes even though she doesn't do a good job... at all... I let her give just about anyone a hug! Yes, I let her talk to strangers! (I don't LEAVE her with strangers!)

But honestly my toddler is healthy and happy. She is one of the most considerate, caring, and helpful toddlers I've ever seen...

I can't tell you how many times her chubby smile has made someone's day!

Maybe you look at what I do and see so many things you'd be doing differently, but I won't change what I do or the way I parent. I look at both my girls and how wonderful they are and quite frankly I think I'm doing a pretty damn good job with them both!