Recently someone asked me if I'd ever felt lost with my life with no sense of direction. My heart really went out to her at that moment because I absolutly had felt that way before, and I'm sure most people in the world feel that way at some point in their lives. I felt like that a lot when I use to be a stay at home mom. Some days I just didn't want to get out of bed. I'd acomplish so much in one day and the only ones who saw it was a baby who couldn't talk and a four year old who didn't care. When I did call someone up to talk about my day I didn't have much exciting to say "Oh well I folded laundry and made lunch and dinner all in 3 hours!" Usuaully whomever I was talking to wouldn't be as excited as me and usually felt the need to offer me a cookie...
When you get into a funk like that it can be pretty hard to get out of it. It's too easy to look at the big picture and think "So this is it... this is my life..." Stop doing that! In this moment. Right now. This IS your life, but life right now is NOT the big picture. There is so much more out there going to happen and so much more that can and will happen as long as you make it happen.
Whilist I was in my funk I started several life changing things. I started writing this blog which was a way for my to truly get my mind out there. I illustrated a series of children's books and now you can look up "JD Kurtz" on Amazon and see them. This was the beginning of something new. My new goal in life was not to simply be ther mother of my two wonderful girls. While that IS my life right now it's not everything I am and I do intend to make a real different in this world. Weather it be through my art, my writing, or simply through my children.
Secondly I started getting out of the house more. Even if I didn't want to I'd make myself get dressed every day and I'd take the kids to the park, to storytime at the library, to the free movies in the summer time, or to the beach. I'd do anything to get out and socialize with adults. This meant I drove over the bay with Angel many more times, and she finally got to see dolphins! The day we finally saw dolphins together I pulled over on the side of the road probably looking foolish as I grabbed my six year old and let her sit on the car. I held her still as the wind tried to blow us away. It took her a minute, but I kept pointing them out and then they jumped up right in front of us. That was one of those moments when I said "Yes, this is my life, and my life is GOOD!"
You've got your whole life to do whatever you want with it. Don't let this moment ruin your future! Sometimes you have to just put yourself out there, your creativity, your thoughts, your dreams, your goals, or whatever. Sometimes you've got to get out of the hosue more. Sometimes you've just got to stop and see the dolphins.